Samuel Tuffnuts

Sam bear dog,

For your heart he will hog.

He has one unusual bod,

For he is a tripod.

But wait, it doesn't stop there,

For his lower teeth he does bare.

They look like little candy corns,

Those yellow and orange looking horns.

And his breath will knock you out,

I dare you to get close to that snout.

Here's one that will steal your heart,

Sam gets scared from his own fart.

Your nose will know if he's let one get past,

And you'll never see him move so fast.

But he does not bark,

Not even at a lark.

He does, however, sound like a boar,

If he sees a bitch that he can score. 

Sam does not discriminate,

For he likes all dogs with no certain trait.

He is definitely one for the books,

But not just for his looks.

His personality is truly unique,

But you should also see him take a leak!!

Is he just standing or is he emptying his bladder? 

For a tripod, the joys are usually in the latter.

Sam does enjoy a daily walk, 

Watch him fly up the hill and then you too will talk.

About this dog that is truly unique, 

Even if he is a napping freak.

And when he wakes - human feces is his feast,

For Sam Bear Dog, he is a beast.